Eight review quotes for David Archuleta, the debut album from Utah’s American Idol runner-up, released this week:

8. “My boss told me to say that it’s fabulous!” (The Salt Lake Tribune)

7. “My bishop told me to say that it’s fabulous!” (Deseret News)

6. “It’s fabulous!” (MormonTimes.com)

5. “Crunk beats, dope lyrics-just be sure to have your insulin nearby.” (Diabetic Times)

4. “OMG! OMG! OMG! He’s sooo cute! Wait, there’s a CD inside.” (Teen Twitter)

3. “Perfect for baking banana-oatmeal cookies to or shimming a wobbly table leg with.” (Martha Stewart Living)

2. “Should make a healthy first-quarter profit. Five stars!” (Utah Business)

1. “Nobody sent us a copy, so screw it.” (Salt Lake City Weekly)