Stay Away From Strange, Big Birds in Utah County | Buzz Blog
Support the Free Press | Facts matter. Truth matters. Journalism matters
Salt Lake City Weekly has been Utah's source of independent news and in-depth journalism since 1984. Donate today to ensure the legacy continues.

Stay Away From Strange, Big Birds in Utah County

by

comment

The cassowary could be the meanest mofo in the bird kingdom. About as big as an ostrich with razor-sharp talons, it can and will attack humans.

... And there could be one on the loose in Utah County! If so, stay the hell away from it; it's injured and considered highly disgruntled.

The cassowary's plumage is really quite striking--like Carol Channing after her third costume change. And, like a Carol Channing costume change, it costs a couple hundred grand.

Here's a picture of a cassowary attacking a guy using specialized anti-cassowary protective equipment.

Kids, don't try this at home:

bird2_1.jpg