This just in: Fox has officially canceled Breaking In, Human Target, Traffic Light, Lie to Me and The Chicago Code. In other words, almost everything I watch on Fox. Thanks. Oh, and check the new True TV Podcast. ---

What’s new tonight:
Breaking In (Fox) Well, what the fuck? Might as well watch the final episodes of Christian Slater’s admittedly uneven (but still damned funny) comedy about a gonzo security firm, with solid support from Bret Harrison (Reaper) and Michael Rosenbaum (virtually unrecognizable as the former Lex Luthor from Smallville), if not the shoulda-been-better Trevor Moore (The Whitest Kids U’Know). Breaking In has tonight and next week’s finale, then it’s just wall-to-wall karaoke and cartoons on Fox.

Survivor: Redemption Island (CBS) The finale is Sunday: If you don’t get rid of Boston Rob tonight, he’s going to win it all, chumps—just sayin.’ Meanwhile, hot-dumb blonde Andrea faces off against hot-dumb blonde Matt in a hot-dumb Redemption challenge.

Happy Endings (ABC) Will ABC cancel this, Mr. Sunshine or Better With You? The last one can suck it; Happy Endings and Mr. Sunshine deserve another shot/season. In the meantime, just watch Happy harder, and check out last week’s hysterical Hipsters/Zombies episode here.

South Park (Comedy Central) It’s time to piss all over the Royal Wedding! Actually, last week was the time to piss all over the Royal Wedding, but close enough—as is Canada, where South Park’s “Royal Pudding” (?) episode takes place. Just go with it.

Also new tonight:
The Middle, Better With You, Modern Family, Cougar Town (ABC); Criminal Minds: Suspect Behavior (CBS); Minute to Win It, Law & Order: SVU (NBC); American Idol (Fox); America’s Next Top Model (The CW); The Ultimate Fighter (Spike); Extreme Couponing, Spouse vs. House (TLC); The Real World, The Electric Barbarellas (MTV); Top Chef Masters (Bravo); Workaholics (Comedy Central); Conan (TBS) 

Preview: Ever wonder if the waiter spit in your food? Happy Endings does ...