When Dad (J.K. Simmons) suffers a heart attack, it’s up to his perpetual-failure son (Kyle Bornheimer) to come home and take over his “Mr. Jiffy Fix” handyman business. The cast (which also includes King of Queens’ Leah Remini) ain’t bad, but Family Tools is only slightly funnier than seeing Ty Pennington nude. And, sadly, an indicator of where the network wants to take its comedies: out of the city, away from those edgy singles (like Happy Endings) and into the suburbs with those quirky clans (the still un-replicate-able Modern Family). Just putting Family in the title doesn’t cut it, ABC.