Getting through the first year of any publication is difficult, but with Year 2 comes the pressure to match, if not exceed, what came before. And so the Private Eye headed into the summer and fall of 1985 with a little experience under its belt, but still finding its way in an evolving media and political landscape.
Remembering Vol. 2:
In the news
Nick Yengich (1946-1984) was a sportswriter/columnist for the Deseret News and Maryland's Baltimore Sun. He was beloved for his compassion and sense of justice. "He cared," Richard Barnum-Reece wrote in January 1986. "Cats, dogs, and down-and-out people. It mattered to him."
When Yengich—the brother of attorney and Private Eye contributor Ron Yengich—passed away from heart failure at a young age, his loved ones believed that something should be done in his memory. Thus, the Nick Yengich Freedom of the Press Run was born. Aimed for the first weekend in December, the run sought to "benefit some person who had been kicked in the head by life."
That person was Michelle Nicoletti, who had been shot in the face that year by an unknown assailant on Salt Lake City's west side. Race participants sought to defray some of the medical costs faced by Nicoletti, who had no insurance for her hospital bills. The race, reported Barnum-Reece, was "a chance to create an event that speaks to the best in human behavior in response to the worst."
It continues to this day, now known as the Annual Nick E. Yengich/Grandma Gump/Jeff Jensen Memorial 5k Fun Run. And it still aims to raise funds and donations for individuals and organizations in need of support.
"[Nick] wanted us all to live in a better world," Barnum-Reece wrote."He was going about the business of actively trying to make the world a better place by writing stories to expose corrupt politicians, by picking up stray cats and giving them a place to live, and by always, on principle alone, taking the side of the person who needed a hand."
In sports news, Jazz legend Karl Malone arrived in Utah just in time for a shoutout in the July 1985 issue of the Private Eye. "[The Utah Jazz] have a 'Mailman' that doesn't need any mace to stop the barking dogs," wrote Dan Pattison. "One look at him—6'9," 250 pounds—and the dogs run away with their tails between their legs.
In the city
"Hey, girls (and guys after the show)," beckoned the Private Eye in July 1985, "this is going to be your last chance to see those fantastic male dancers, Bare Essence, for quite some time."
The group in question was departing for a nationwide tour. The club Micheal G's hosted Bare Essence for a bon voyage party, and the Private Eye was confident the occasion would not be a let-down.
"We have never been disappointed with their performance," the newsletter declared, "and it seems that just about every lady in Utah Valley feels the same." For the sake of those ladies, we hope everyone had a good time.
"Eye on Sound Advice," a recurring advice section for professional women by Mina Johnson, made its first appearance in September 1985, which by the next month was already bringing the fire.
Responding to a submission for the "Gripe of the Month" about co-workers who waste company time with conversation and loitering, Johnson queried: "Are you sure your supervisors know or care about these problems? Also, I wonder, did you type this letter on your time or company time? A little introspection is in order here."
Notable criticism was also directed by Private Eye writers upon contradictory visions of local justice, as well as the emerging "yuppie" (young upwardly-mobile professional) lifestyle. For John Saltas, in January 1986, yuppies were "creeps" whose only takeaway from the 1960s and 1970s was that "it is not only OK to seek status, it is also OK to flaunt it. So yuppies flaunt."
As for columnist Ron Yengich, in November 1985, the shortsightedness of releasing nonviolent offenders of Utah's liquor laws in honor of the holiday season (the "Christmas kick-out") during the chilliest time of the year left him cold.
"Most return within a few hours either too drunk or too cold to accept the gratitude of their release, and are slapped in the drunk tank—home once again," Yengich observed. "It seems a contradiction to me that we're only concerned with freeing these people once a year when it's too cold for them to stay free."
In the ads
Tel-A-Comp, "America's favorite answering service," offered a free seven-day trial of its system, with the high-tech offer of "a cordless electronic telephone" if one entered into a six-month lease or purchased the service before the end of September 1985. One wonders how many took up the offer and whether they "never" missed another call, as Tel-A-Comp promised.
Gus Paulos (1941-2006), who helped turn a family car franchise into one of the leading dealerships in the country, had a penchant for humorous advertisements. In an October 1985 ad, Paulos demonstrated his fidelity to the University of Utah's football team as only he could. Driving one of his cars out onto the field, Paulos is shown to have "hit" a player from a certain opposing team to the south.
Book addicts could rejoice—in May 1986, The Book Attic in Midvale advertised its willingness to exchange one's completed volumes for future purchases: "Once you've read it," the shop offered, "bring it in for credit." Not a bad idea.
In the market
In June 1985, as the Private Eye launched its second volume, realtor Dave Jones was nervous about the national debt, which he suggested was the primary factor behind unstable interest rates at the time. "I know, you are sick and tired of hearing everybody cry about the national debt," he wrote, before comparing the federal government to a person locked into a large house payment who then charges every whim to their Visa.
"Today's debt is about $200 billion. Over the next five years, it's expected to reach $1.5 trillion!" Jones wrote. "This equates to almost $3,000 per family, and it is happening without the family's permission."
The next five years would ultimately see the nation's debt swell to $3 trillion, or double Jones' warning. Today, in 2023, federal debt totals more than $32 trillion, which translates to almost $100,000 per individual citizen.
In the kitchen:
Carl Rubadue—a professional chef who wrote a recurring, eponymous recipe section for the Private Eye—always had a delectable item for home cooks to try on their own, from fondues and sauces to main plate dishes. In one memorable entry for May 1986, he offered "a different kind of sandwich," the Peanut Butter and Bacon Sandwich, as follows:
¾ cup chunky peanut butter
¼ cup mayonnaise
¼ teaspoon salt (optional)
1 chopped Claussen pickle
¼ medium tomato chopped
Chopped bacon
Fresh ground black pepper
4 pieces bread toasted - 1 side only
"Mix items one through seven and spread on untoasted side of bread. Put under broiler til golden brown. Bon appetit!"
