Eight possible thoughts running through Michelle Bachmann’s mind on the latest Newsweek magazine cover:
8. “Are you there, God? It’s me, Michelle!”
7. “This is going to be sooo much better than that idiot Palin’s cover.”
6. “If I undo one more button, I’ll turn those homos around.”
5. “But what about the lesbians? Being a thought leader is hard.”
4. “I can’t wait to have an intern read this article to me.”
3. “This is for The Celebrity Apprentice, right? Where’s Mr. Trump and Lil Jon?”
2. “Should not have worn the thong today—it’s creeping up faster than the debt ceiling. Oooh, remember to write that one down …”
1. “A minimum-wage photographer wouldn’t make me look crazy … would he?”