Decriminalizing Booze and Bee Stings | News | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly


Decriminalizing Booze and Bee Stings



Republican congressional candidate Derek Smith and his spokeswoman, Laurie Maddox, say they don’t have a problem with ethics. Hey, no foolin’?

Recently, Maddox wrote a flattering piece on Smith in the south valley Voice newspaper under the name JoAnna Groves. It gave no mention that she was affiliated with Smith. When Salt Lake Tribune hit man Dan Harrie asked Maddox about the charade, she shrugged it off. “I was fine with it,” she said. As for Smith? “He didn’t have an opinion one way or the other,” Maddox said.

Ethics? No, they don’t have a problem with ethics at Smith’s campaign; they just don’t have any. So what’s the problem?

It’s no secret that Smith’s campaign has been hitting low on Democratic Scott Matheson. Smith is sending out 8-by-10 inch glossies of Jane Fonda showing a little cleavage with a headline reading, “Why are liberals like Jane Fonda backing Jim Matheson?”

This is the same Derek Smith who has accepted $1 million from Washington Republicans. Do you wonder where that money originated? Can you say, “tobacco?” Can you say, “distilleries?” Can you say, “pharmaceuticals?” Can you say, “hypocritical?” Hey, Smith doesn’t have a problem with that, either.

Here’s something from our Megalomania-file: Publishing scion Michael Kearns said he didn’t like Smith and Maddox pulling a fast one on the Voice’s readers. But Kearns, who used to own a piece of the Voice, penned several articles himself in that paper under the pseudonym W. Stewart Bushfield. (As Dave Barry might say, we are not making this up.)

Mr. Bushfield wrote glowingly about the Silver King Media Group, which Kearns owns, and what a genius this Michael Kearns guy is. At least he’s got one fan.

Our beloved Salt Lake City mayor, Rocky Anderson, has done it again. He used the L-word in connection with the A-word. That’s right, the mayor announced that we ought to “liberalize” the way we distribute alcohol in Utah. That drove some folks bananas. The LDS church and the Salt Lake (Olympic) Organizing Committee didn’t like Rocky’s proposal to distribute wine in school lunchrooms. Please Rocky, when talking about beer and wine and private clubs, don’t use the word “liberalize.”

Correction: The mayor said “grocery stores” not “school lunchrooms.” Our mistake. We here at Smartbomb apologize for any pain it may have caused school kids who want to grow up to take steroids, win Olympic medals and make millions in endorsements.

Finally, from our Sticky Situation file, this: Sylvia Vosen, from Vosen’s Bread Paradise, called to tell us that the “bee sting” desserts we featured from Cucina in our Ninth Annual Dining Guide are actually made at Vosen’s and sold to Cucina. She wants credit where credit is due. Well by golly, we couldn’t agree more.

We just hope Rocky doesn’t get involved, suggesting we liberalize desserts, too. Imagine the headline: “Mayor Says Decriminalize Desserts: Church, SLOC Go Berserk.”

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