7. The millionaire making more millions across the country will have no bearing on your existence.
6. Maybe you’ll ponder how stupid and ineffectual the #Stayward hashtag was.
5. ... and come to the realization that it should have been #GordoNoGo.
4. The sportsball man sportsing in another town won’t impact you in the least.
3. The Jazz will still never win a championship because the NBA is a rigged, fraudulent system.
2. I mean, keep on believin’!
1. Like you’re even going to notice that there’s one less white guy in Utah.