Dear Readers: Your faithful Mexican is putting the final touches to his coming magnum opus, Taco USA: How Mexican Food Conquered America (out April 2012), and is thus at the rancho, getting handmade tortillas made by his chica in pigtails while I work on rewrites. But instead of a Best Of columna, I’ve decided to print excerpts from one of my all-time favorite reader interactions. Remember back in 2007, when I asked ustedes who are half-Mexican and half-something else to tell us what you call yourselves? The brilliant, hilarious responses offered show how genius the Mexi brain truly is. Space doesn’t allow your local rag to print all the responses, but below are just some of the best. You can find the full list online—in the meanwhile, enjoy and see you in una semana!
Half-British: Limey beans
Half-Arab: Garbanzo beaner, America’s worst nightmare.
Half-Czech: Czecano, Czex-Mex, Czexican, Mexislovakian
Half-German: Beanerschnitzel, chili kraut, Germexican, wiener beaner
Half-Indian (the Indian kind): Apachichano, Cherocano, Cheyennexican, Commanchano, Mexiskin (half-Mexican, half-Redskin), Navacano, Navajole, Navajo Taco
Half Scandinavian: Hispandinavian
Half-Somali: Hot Somali
Half-White: Honky-Tonk, Gringateca, Mejiyanqui, Mexi-melts, Whics
Half-Irish: Celtic Aztec, green bean, Irlandicanos, Leprecano, McBeaner, McSpic, Mick Spic, O’Beaner, Paddy-Mex
Half-Cornish: Cornish tortilla
Half-Chinese: Chexican, Chinacan, Chinkano, Combination Plate, Mexinese, rice & beans, soy bean
Half-Filipino: ChicaPina (for Chicana and Pinay, which is a Tagalog slang term for Filipina), Chilipino, Filixan, Filitino, Flipamex, Flippican, JalaPinoy, Mexipino
Half-Gabacho: Amerilanga (combination of American and chilanga, nickname for someone from Mexico City), Caucano, Chicanguera, Gabaxicano, GMC (Gringo-Mexico cross), Guerexican, Latinglo, Mexiglos, Mixican, Pochingo (half-pocho, half-gringo), Whispanic, white bean
Half-Italian: Mexican pizza, Mexitalian, Spicawop, Spic-talian, Wopsican
Half-Oklahomian: Chokies, Okie-Frijoles
Half-Peruvian: Lima Bean
Half-Puerto Rican: Bori-Mex, Messyrican, Mexiricaña, MexiRican, Porto-Mex
Half-Scottish: McRiguez, Scottsican
Half-Redneck: Rednexican, Redback, Wetneck
Ask the Mexican at firstname.lastname@example.org, Facebook.com/GArellano, YouTube.com/AskAMexicano, find him on Twitter, or write via snail mail at: Gustavo Arellano, P.O. Box 1433, Anaheim, CA 92815-1433!