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Hold Your Breath

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Congratulations, Wasatch Front! Kudos to us all for our unfailing commitment to one of the largest collective-suicide pacts of all time.

Who needs Jim Jones and cyanide Kool-Aid when we have the diabolical combination of church (oops, I mean state) and industry, a guaranteed recipe for respiratory failure? And, similar to Guyana, you just couldn’t ask for a more scenically beautiful location. Enjoy the air; we’ve earned it.

COLYN KILMER
Salt Lake City

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