Now, the majority of parents wouldn’t dream of changing a baby’s diaper at poolside or forgetting to wash a kid thoroughly before putting him or her back in the water. But the fact that we must be told by the government not to do such things means that there are a few among us who cannot be trusted to, say, not go swimming for two weeks after recovering from a case of the squitters. If these scatophiles cannot be spotted on sight, then perhaps we need to identify and tag them for shunning purposes.

The state is accepting public comment for 30 days. Personally, I’ll be happy if I never have to hear the term “swim diaper” ever again.