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News » Staff Box

Local Business Relocation



Sen. Valentine is out to kill the Utah liquor business. If you had a Utah business, where would you relocate?

Rachel Scott: I would move right into the heart of Zion! I would park my street cart right out in front of the Church Office Building and sell nothing but “special” Jell-O.

James Canterbury: I would relocate to my “Celestial Kingdom.”

Erik Daenitz: I wouldn’t relocate. I’d just go Boardwalk Empire on ’em.

Eric Peterson: If I had a viable Utah business, I would assume it would be one that conformed with the values of the people and culture surrounding it. So If I was forced to move it, I would go somewhere with similar values ... say, Saudi Arabia or Pakistan.

Rachel Piper: England. All my skills are in dying industries, but in the U.K. they still respect stuff like printed newspapers, bookshops and spinster detectives.

Kolbie Stonehocker: The Internet.

Jeff Reese: I would never give up! Never! It is seriously pathetic that since he can’t take the drink out of our hands, he will just wage war on productive tax-paying businesses. What happened to live and let live?

Dan Nailen: Elko, Nevada. Still close enough to SLC to visit, with the added bonus of in-house gambling.

Pete Saltas:
I like Utah. Can we relocate Sen. Valentine instead?

Jerre Wroble: Thailand, to operate an elephant-riding business. After years of having Utah’s trumpeting elephants on my back, it would be a nice change.