Eight questions we opted not to ask club owners for City Weekly’s Bar Guide 2014:

8. “Are you familiar with Jon Taffer of Bar Rescue? Because we invited him here today!”

7. “Would you say the DABC are total dicks, or just colossal tools?”

6. “What’s your secret for the perfect wobbly table?”

5. “The DABC: Power-mad tyrants, or soulless dictators?”

4. “Where are all the hot bikini girls from your ad?”

3. “Come on, they’ll never read this: One a scale of 1 to Al-Queda, how would you rate the DABC?”

2. “Admit it: You carry 500 craft beers and customers only buy PBR and Bud, right?”

1. [Whispered] “That’s a DABC drone with a camera flying right outside, isn’t it?”