Nick Clark: I would protest Walmart’s cheap wares to the tune of Neil Young’s “Piece of Crap.”
Derek Carlisle: In the spirit of the Irish who helped build this country, “Oh Juan-y Boy” should be sung loud to support the rights of the Spanish whose sweat we wring out of our flag.
Nick Morgan: Utah’s increasingly asinine liquor laws. If we lose daily drink specials, you’ll find me on the picket line. “You gotta fight, for your right, to paaaarty!”
Rachel Scott: Hell! What wouldn’t I protest?! Basically, everything boils down to the tea party Republicans, who are a bunch of Bible-thumping, hypocritical, misogynist, middle-class-crushing bastards. I would play angry lesbian music—both politically charged and sexy.
Erik Daenitz: I would protest the mass disservice of a speculative banking industry that removes wealth from the many for the few. So, Kanye West, “Who Will Survive in America.”
Jackie Briggs: I would fight for my right to live my life how I see fit. Consenting adults should be able to marry whomever and however many people we want. I would be protesting to “It’s Raining Men,” and by protesting, I of course mean dancing in the streets, in drag, to that song.
Scott Renshaw: I’d protest stridently for greater financial resources in public education, then use “The Greatest Love of All” as my protest song so hipsters would wonder whether I was being ironic.
Jesse Fruhwirth: Phil Ochs’ “I Ain’t Marching Anymore.” YouTube it before you’re drafted into the Yemen war.