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Curator, Cure my Hangover!

Newsroom staffers share their post-rager tips and tricks.
By City Weekly staff

It's no secret journalists are professional drinkers. To quote our great governor, we're known to drink till our eyes bug out, and still manage to meet our deadlines the following morning (most of the time). So, if you're looking for help in appearing semi-normal post Beer Fest—or any other weekend for that matter—you've come to the right place. Take it from the experts: The road to pickled livers is filled with regret, V8, Velveeta and ... more booze?

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"I'm no stranger to that feeling, so heed my words: Keep an emergency bottle of Gatorade Pepino Limón (no relation) in the ice chest, pop a couple of ibuprofen without even thinking about it and drive, walk, scoot or crawl to Rancherito's Mexican Food in South Salt Lake (3450 S. State) for a sports bottle-sized chorizo and egg burrito. The Technicolor orange chorizo grease will drip down your face as you devour that bad boy, leaving a coat that's hard to scrub. (ProTip: Use the time you're branded with the Mexi-scarlet letter to nap or, you know, reconsider your life choices.)"
—Enrique Limón, editor

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"I'm a professional beer journalist and we don't get hangovers. However, on those rare occasions when I'm feeling a wee bit mortal and a little 'hair of the dog' is called for, I reach for a light lager, a can of Spicy V8 and three Aleve tablets. Boing! It's like magic."
—Mike Riedel, beer columnist

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I haven't had a hangover in many years, sooo, my thoughts are this: Practice. It's like exercise. The more you drink, the better you are at it. That's not to say become an alcoholic—just drink more than other people in your group of friends. Drink two glasses of wine to their one glass. This practice technique also works well with getting by the .05% rule and driving like a pro. If you feel like you're getting drunk, stop before it's too late. A nice buzz and happy feeling is good to go.
—Kathy Biele, columnist

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"It's been many years since I really had to worry about a hangover—parenting and trying to turn into a responsible citizen will do that to a guy—but it's easy for me to remember the worst one I ever had. And it happened to be the day of my college graduation ceremony, when the celebratory revels of the night before caught up with me, I had to put on a smiley face for my proud parents (and grandparents), and it was 90 degrees for the outdoor commencement walk. How did I deal with it? I don't ever remember drinking so much water in my life, and I could neither tell you anything our commencement speaker said, nor how I made it through two hours without peeing."
—Scott Renshaw, A&E editor

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"My favorite hangover cure generally starts with a deep regret of lack of water consumption. What follows is my attempt to be healthy (salads, veggies, the works) ending with carb-filled entrées including, but not limited to, Velveeta Mac & Cheese (the microwave cups ONLY). Drink water, kids."
—Kara Rhodes, contributor

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"An overnight stay in Drunktown must always end with a couple glasses of water. The morning after, the first thing I'm dying for is coffee, more water and some kind of food nutrient that will ideally stay in my stomach. Vietnamese pho is the ultimate go-to. I order the biggest size bowl on the menu with beef flank, brisket, tendon, and tripe, and let the broth and rice noodles heal my wounded soul."
—Peter Holslin, staff writer

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A liquid diet is what gets me going again after a night of imbibing too many liquids of the toxic variety. If I'm hungry, a sweet, sour thai soup does the trick for me, but more frequently, if I'm on the go and don't have time to dine, my go-to is another cocktail of sorts. I like stopping at the Harmons by my house to pick up my holy trio of coconut water, refreshing ginger or lavender kombucha and cold brew. Yep, all three, back to back. Coconut water does what Gatorade does with electrolytes, but better, and zaps a headache while also rehydrating my poor, dried up veins. Kombucha settles an upset stomach and restores appetite. And the coffee? Well, coffee is coffee and it does what it does, but I always save it for last, when my body feels almost normal again.
—Erin Moore, music editor

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"Well, if you don't have too many responsibilities the next day, sometimes it's best to keep the party going. The first beer might be hard to get through, but it's smooth-sailing after that. Call it rollover minutes or a shampoo party. Why? Wash, rinse, repeat—you don't need as much the second time around. Every heard of Sunday Funday? So I guess I'm just saying put off the hangover ... sigh."
—Ray Howze, editorial assistant

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I trek over to the Ice Haus (7 E. 4800 South, Murray) and order a bloody mary from barkeep Andrew Burt. Served with pickled asparagus spears (and bacon, if you request it), olives and a lemon wedge and, of course, 1 1/2 ounces of Tito's vodka—the headache-banishing beverage isn't too bland or too spicy ... it's just right. If you need more zest. Andrew's always sassy commentary fills the bill. Did I mention the bar's open at 10 a.m. on weekends?
—Lance Gudmundsen, proofreader


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