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The Ocho

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Eight reasons Major League Soccer “savior” Freddy Adu left Real Salt Lake and the USA for Portugal’s Benfica:

8. Filming for his reality TV show, Adu to America, co-starring either Baby or Sporty Spice (contract pending), begins soon.

7. His stunning 2007 season record of 1 goal and 2 assists was just too hot for Benfica to ignore.

6. Adu and his entourage got bored with rollin’ at Studio 600.

5. Soccer is taken more seriously in Europe, as are rugby, kayaking and other sports with adorable short pants.

4. That Adu to Hashimoto Hyundai car dealership was never going to pan out.

3. He was tired of being mistaken for a Utah Jazz mascot at Iggy’s Sports Grill’s VIP table.

{::INSERTAD::}2. Portuguese soccer groupies put out; Utah soccer groupies … don’t exist.

1. Salt Lake City’s infrastructure can only support so many overpaid professional athletes.