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The Other Bills

8 lesser-known bills passed by the 2015 Utah Legislature

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8. Anybody can marry anybody—but only in the presence of the Father, the Son, the Holy Ghost and that one Mormon relative who's "cool with it."

7. Tougher clean-air standards for fat-cat corporate polluters.

6. Easier discreet payoff solutions for fat-cat corporate polluters.

5. Medical marijuana, breastfeeding mothers and e-cigarettes have been wished to the cornfield.

4. The Utah State Prison will also be relocated to said cornfield.

3. Lyft and Uber drivers who force passengers to listen to dubstep will face the (newly reinstated) firing squad.

2. Stricter regulation of local Liberal Media by the Illuminati.

1. In addition to a raise, Gary Herbert also gets a new bouncy house behind the Governor's Mansion.

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