Eight rules of Rocktober:
8. Bands featuring a banjo, accordion or member named Jayden do not rock.
7. Bands featuring at least one dead member and a Tinnitus Index listing rock.
6. Body spray (Axe, Bod, etc.) does not rock.
5. Beer spray (PBR, Natty Light, etc.) leftover from the weekend rocks.
4. The AC/DC shirt you bought at Walmart does not rock.
3. The Foo Fighters shirt you shoplifted from Target (relatively) rocks.
2. Christian rock does not rock. Neither does LDS rock (argue amongst yourselves vis-Ã -vis Christians vs. Mormons).
1. Rocking in the name of Our Master Satan will always rock … How was that, Oh Great One?