Time Warp | Staff Box | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly
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News » Staff Box

Time Warp

What would you tell your 17-year-old self if you had the chance?


What would you tell your 17-year-old self if you had the chance?

Alissa Dimick: Go to college, no matter how impossible it may feel. Eat all the carbs while you can, and then stop when you are 21. You get fat and it’s not pretty.

Scott Renshaw: Oooooh no. I’ve read enough science-fiction stories to know how this works out, and it’s never good.

Jeff Chipian: Where would I start? Slow down; speeding tickets add up real quick. The Patriots win the Super Bowl; Bet everything! Don’t buy half of the shit I bought! Do not see Spider-man 2. Greece wins the Euro Cup; Again, bet everything!

John Saltas: Not to wear pajamas to gym class. I got away with it so thought I was a rebel, but I failed gym as a result. Who fails gym? But since it didn’t matter, it didn’t hurt. Failure should hurt or else you don’t learn.

Colin Wolf: Well, the most logical thing to do would be to give my 17-year-old self a copy of Gray’s Sports Almanac, tell him to pick the winners, invest the money in a casino, and ultimately marry Loraine Baines.

Ylish Merkley: Invest in flappy bird, and be prepared to make millions of people incredibly frustrated. Laugh maniacally. Though honestly, I would say to never give up on my dreams and goals, and if I’m not truly happy I need to move on to something better.

Jeff Reese: Learn to program right away, start building web applications (don’t let Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg have all the fun), and retire early.